Once a week

It must be time for my once a week update. I mean, I'm here, it's been a week, so why not? I'm fighting a cold or sinus infection or something. Runny nose, coughing, sinus drainage. Yay. And just in time for tonight's Messiah performance.

Running has taken a backseat once again. At least until I get over whatever is making me cough my head off. I've signed up to do a 100 mile challenge. The goal is to run at least 100 miles by the end of February. It's doable...if I would start doing. I'm 6.68 miles in. My last run was this past Friday and I did 3.58 miles in 42.44 minutes. At least I'm fairly consistent. I hope I can be back out by the end of this week. I want to start 10K training at the beginning of January, so I need to be more consistent between now and then.

That's about all the news that is news for now.

Nothing new to report here. I've not run in almost a week. Tomorrow will change that, though, since the school has running club. I am planning on starting 10K training come Monday. Last time I used the training plan on active.com, but I think I'll go with Podrunner: Intervals Freeway to 10K this time. The training plan there is laid out in intervals rather than longer runs once a week. I'm thinking I can probably start at week 3 or 4 since there is walking involved.

We're getting ready for Christmas around here. The tree has been up since the day after Thanksgiving. I've bought all of two presents, though. I'm thinking that will be my project this weekend: finishing Christmas shopping and hopefully with Clayton. The kids will be at his parents' house Friday night to spend the night, so why not turn our date night into a shopping night?

Besides Christmas shopping, I really need to get out and buy a black dress. Like yesterday. I need it for Tuesday night when my church choir does Handel's Messiah as a sing-a-long with the community. I'm really looking forward to that, but need a dress.

I've been exercising at the top of every hour still. If nothing else, it's helping me maintain my weight within half a pound. I know getting back to running will help it start dropping again.

Isaiah 40

I was reading in Isaiah 40 this morning and this verse really jumped off the page at me:

Behold, the nations are like a drop from a bucket,
And are regarded as a speck of dust on the scales;
Behold, He lifts up the islands like fine dust. - Isaiah 40:15

Wow. If the nations are like a drop...then what are you and I? Yet, He loved us enough to send Jesus to die for our sin. So thankful that God loves me that much.

The past week

Wow, I really should blog a little more often. It's been over a week, but this has been the most consistent I've ever been with blogging. Last week was Thanksgiving. What a fantastic week, minus the exhaustion I had at the end of the week. I had the carpet in the house cleaned Tuesday; that's a whole 'nother story in itself. Suffice it to say that it's clean and I paid more than I planned on. Tuesday night was the community-wide Thanksgiving meal at church. There were many faces I did not recognize that were there, so many people from the surrounding area, not just the church. Lots of food, but not much left over. Wednesday was another crazy day with having to pick up milk and starting on Christmas shopping for the kids and giving blood. Fortunately, my kids were with the in-laws and I could do all that stuff by myself. My parents arrived Wednesday afternoon with my nephew. Later in the day, my brother, his wife, and their daughter arrived. It was a fun time from the minute they stepped in the door. (The baby had pooped out her clothes and had to be put in the bathtub to get cleaned off AND my brother had to take care of her because my SIL can't lift her right now). All that was taken care of and I decided to start cooking for Thursday...just the cornbread for dressing. My cornbread mix was old. Like 2 years old. So, I throw it in the trash and make a late night run to Food Lion. My brother went with me and we got to catch up with each other.

Thursday was great. I love having a house full of people. We missed Phil and Beth and their kids, though. I woke up at 5:45 Thursday morning and was wide awake, so I went ahead and got up and baked pumpkin bread for breakfast. The turkey went in as soon as the bread came out. Couldn't find the giblets, though. Apparently they were hiding in the neck cavity. I'll know where to look next time. Got all the food cooking in the time frame I planned...almost. I didn't prep some of it before time to put it in the oven, so that threw my schedule off a bit. I also, after looking at the cornbread and consulting with my brother, decided that we didn't have enough cornbread for dressing. So, we made some more. We had a great time eating and conversing and just being with each other. Kristin opened birthday presents right before we ate. We sang to her and had strawberry shortcake after lunch. Everyone left before evening except my parents, who were spending the night.

Friday morning saw me taking Clayton to work after I stayed up until midnight reading. I decided to start making use of the Kindle app on my phone and have since discovered that I actually like reading on it. After I got home from taking him and stopping at Target for coffee and something else that I can't remember and breakfast from Chick-Fil-A, we got the Christmas tree and decorations out. My parents left for Atlanta and the kids and I put up the tree and decorated it. I got an hour nap before it was time to get Clayton from work so we could head to Atlanta ourselves. We made decent time to Jason and Allison's house and we actually met them at Jim & Nick's for supper. Good food and fellowship. Got to their house after eating and Allison's sisters, brother-in-law, nieces, and nephew showed up to decorate cupcakes and presumably to play games. Yeah, the game part didn't happen. They finished decorating cupcakes sometime just before midnight. Hilarity ensued not long after everyone got there, mostly on my part. I was so tired that just about everything was funny. I laughed so hard I cried...at what I have no idea.

Saturday was my niece's one-year-old birthday party. We had lunch and cupcakes. All in all, a good time with family...even if I had a headache and was exhausted. I actually slept on the way home from Atlanta and it didn't take me long to go to sleep at all. I went to bed fairly early Saturday night and took a nap Sunday afternoon and went to bed early Sunday night. I skipped a meeting and church Sunday (night) in order to get rest. I woke up this morning feeling much better.

We had a great week, but I'm glad it's over now.

Plateau

The weight loss has hit a plateau. I'm losing and gaining the same 3 pounds. So, in an effort to get past that plateau, I decided that I will take 4 hours in each day and do a couple sets of a couple exercises at the top of each of those hours. I started Thursday and also did it Friday. I ran a 5K today, so I'm pretty sure I'm going to skip it today. I'm doing 2 sets of 15 of the following: jumping jacks, torso twists, lunges, squats, triceps extensions (with a 3 or 5 pound hand weight), biceps curls (with 5 pound weights), side lunges, and wall push-ups. It's doing 2 things for me: 1) getting me off my butt while I'm working and 2) giving me a little more energy during the day. I've also seen 1.5 pounds drop from Thursday to Friday. Don't know if that is because of the exercise or doing better with my water or what.

My 5K time today was 36.13. I'm happy with that time...I had to walk in a couple spots. Not used to a trail run.

Four times in two chapters

I sat down at the computer this morning with the intention of blogging. I decided to start working instead. Where are my priorities? Ha. Anyway, was doing my chapter study for John 15 this morning and came across the "whatever you ask in my name, I will do it" (my paraphrase, obviously) verses. Again. Twice. Again. I had already read that (twice) in chapter 14. Must be important, huh? For Jesus to repeat it 4 times. Not 2. Not 3. Four. Got me to thinking about my last blog about these verses and my request, if you will. Child number 3. It gets discouraging after a while waiting for God to bless us with that child. It's been almost 4 years since we stopped preventing pregnancy. That's a long time. Our first child took 7 months to conceive, the second 18 months. Trying to earnestly seek Him and patiently wait. Yeah, I have my own set of criteria that I want met. Will it happen? Maybe. It's HIS timing and HIS will. Not mine.

Veterans Day

I do not want to neglect the fact that today is Veterans Day. I am very thankful for the men and women who serve this country so that we may have freedom. May God truly bless you in all you do.

Running stuff

This week hasn't been a good week for running. I was under 2.5 miles both Monday and Wednesday. Saturday, Andrew and I went to the track to run, but he didn't make it a full lap and gave up, so we came home. I ran once we got here and did 3.1. Then Monday and Wednesday. Not going to look up distances, but I was just so tired both those days and my legs just didn't want to go. And then we have today. Friday. The end of the week. My best run yet. I did 3.5 miles in 40.46 today. I was aiming for 3.5 all week, but just haven't been able to do it. Well, I got it today. I plan to hang out at 3.5 for the next week or so and then add between 0.25 and 0.5 to my distance for another week or so and just build up from there. That's the plan, anyway. Cold weather is good for running...it was about 35 this morning. My legs are numb from the cold and I'm dripping sweat. What a combination.

John 14:13-14

"Whatever you ask in my name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask Me anything in My name, I will do it."

The promises of God. If you (BELIEVER) ask in His name, He will do it so that the Father may be glorified.

Every time I think I am content with the 2 children I have, I hear something or see something that makes my heart yearn for the 3rd child that we have not yet been blessed with. Today it was a simple story from Beth Moore about her daughter finding out the gender of her 2nd child. The image of Beth Moore digging into a gift bag and pulling out pink items was enough to bring me to tears...and enough to bring me to earnestly start praying for child #3. Claiming God's promises today...that in HIS time we will have our precious #3 child and HE will be glorified through that child.

Not a lot of detail

Not going into a lot of detail, but the next step has been made. Glad that part is over with. Clayton is settling into the new job (now in week 4) well. I am SO thankful for that. A few changes have been made as far as hours, but it still works very well for us.

I had a GREAT run Wednesday. I hit 30 minutes and decided to see how long it would take me to hit 5K. Got there in 37.14. I was excited that I did that much. Loving the cooler weather. My next running days should have been Friday and Monday. Yeah, didn't happen. Both days I woke up needing to crawl back into bed, so that's exactly what I did after I took the kids to school. Planned on running today, but that didn't happen because our power was out when it was time to take the kids and I wanted to be sure to have a hot shower when I was done with the run. I had no idea when the power would be back on...good thing I didn't run because it did not come back on until 9:30. I may just take this week off and start back Monday after the time change and don't have to wait until almost 8 until it's light enough to get out.

I am going to a Bible study at church on Thursday nights. It's a great study because it is fitting in with my life at this moment. Unfortunately, this will be my last week going because Clayton's school schedule starts back next week. He'll be in class Monday through Thursday evenings. I can still plod along at my own pace, though.

I am very thankful for 2 women God has put in my life that I'm just now really getting to know and to rely on for their encouragement.

Anyway, that's just a little update. We're continuing to plod along here some days and speed through others. God is good through it all.

So tired

Thus begins week 3 of being up at 6:30 to take the kids to school. It's a blessing. Really. It. Is. I've been able to run. I've been able to do Wii Fit on the days I don't run. I get started on work earlier most days. And best of all? It means Clayton is still working 7-4. Loving that.

I'm doing a 21-Day weight loss challenge with some people on Facebook. Today is day 15. So far I've lost 1.8 pounds. I was hoping for more, but my weekend eating has been horrid. (It's tasted SO, SO yummy though). Would love to lose 3.7 pounds in the next week to meet my 30 pounds total weight loss goal. I'm going to do it; I just don't know if it will be by Monday.

Running...I've been hitting a wall around 10 minutes. Today, I forced myself just to keep going. And, I did. I didn't look at my watch until after I heard it beep noting a mile. I just pushed myself a couple minutes at a time until I hit 30 minutes. Covered 2.62 miles in that 30 minutes and with the 5 minutes of walking to cool down, I covered 2.87. If I would have run that last 5 minutes, I feel sure I would have hit 5K. Maybe Wednesday.

Long, crazy week

Clayton started work this week! Woohoo! He's working Monday through Friday 7 a.m. to 4 p.m. That's awesome since we'll have weekends now. It's been long for me since I've been having to get up at 6:30 to get the kids to school. It's been beneficial, though, because I've run 3 days this week and have done Wii Fit the other 2 days. I've lost 2 pounds since Monday. Probably just put it back on with the pizza I had for supper, though. Work a couple days has been nuts: 84 minutes one day and 56 the day that was supposed to be my "easy" day. I'm hoping that means that I'll have an easy day one day next week or even a full day off.

Dare I post it?

Clayton reports to work Monday morning! We're so excited! It's been an ordeal to get to this point. Thursday, he was been told to report Monday morning. Then, he got a phone call saying he couldn't report because they hadn't talked to his former supervisors yet. Evidently that's a requirement before they can offer employment. A couple hours later, we get an email saying he can report. Fast forward to Friday. Another phone call from the agency saying that his work history report is not lining up with what he said it was. They said he was only a deputy since this past May. Um, no, unless the last 9 years were a figment of our imaginations. So, we were getting ready to go sign some papers for his school and the phone rang again. The agency wanted to know if we had anything that would prove that he worked there before 2011. So, we ran in and searched for paperwork. We came up with a W-2 from 2003, his certificate from when he graduated from the Criminal Justice Academy, and a couple other things. We went and signed the papers and then headed downtown with our information. The nice lady made copies and we headed out. (To eat...it was date night!) Just as we got the truck parked, the phone rang again. Fortunately, it was the agency saying that the company doing the work history figured out what they did wrong and actually found that he did start in 2002 like he said. Woohoo! So, still on for Monday at 8:30. You can't make this stuff up.

When they talked to one of his supervisors, they asked if he would hire him again. His answer was that if he could, he'd get him to work that night. The response: "He belongs to us now." Yes! That's what we want to hear. Supposedly all this background stuff will not have to be done again when the company hires him permanently.

Thou, Oh Lord

Thou, Oh Lord
Many are they increased that troubled me
Many are they that rise up against me
Many there be which say of my soul
There is no helpe for him in God

But thou, oh Lord are a shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head
Thou, oh Lord are shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head

Repeat

I cried unto the Lord with my voice
And he heard me out of His holy hill
I laid me down and slept and awaked
For the Lord sustained, for he sustained me


Thou, oh Lord are a shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head
Thou, oh Lord are shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head

Repeat Twice

Thou, Oh Lord - Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir

It's in my head and I'm posting it. I had a "down" moment this afternoon, not the first in the last 10 weeks, but one that was different from any other one. God gave me a few words in this song and it just lifted my spirit! You must listen to it!

Cautiously excited

Clayton got log-on info for the new job today. No idea what day he's supposed to go in, but hopefully this week! One step closer.

I ran again today. I'm still aiming for a full 25 minutes of running, but am not succeeding every time yet. I did cover 2.67 miles this morning in 35 minutes of walking/running. At least I'm pretty consistent each time I go out.

My new favorite TV show is The Sing-Off. Even though I have missed it 2 weeks in a row. I'm glad I can watch it online and catch up. Doing that now...

I just noticed that I like to start posts with "so." So, I'll try not to. (See, didn't START it with "so" this time...) I've had my toes stepped on today. A lot. Anything from the type of leader I am (me? a leader? you must be mistaken) to how I am loving God (obedience. need i say more?). Something Whitney said this morning struck a chord within my soul. I don't know that I can repeat it word for word, but the gist of it is that if I'm not spending time reading the Bible and studying the Bible then I am putting those things ahead of God. That those things are more important than time with him. Idols. All of it. She also said that she prays each night that she would be woken up early in the mornings to spend time with God and that she would be focused on that and that she would have the DESIRE to be in the Word when she gets up. BIG, HUGE wake-up call to me (haha). I NEED to be in the Word. I need to have a DESIRE to be in the Word. (Wow, I'm having deja vu here - I think I've written this somewhere before...maybe here, maybe not; can't remember). The first step to loving God (obedience) is being in His Word. Daily. Not when I want to be (which, if I'm honest wouldn't be all that often) and not just when I need to be (tough times). Daily.

"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God - this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing, and perfect will." - Romans 12:1-2.

I cannot be transformed by the renewing of my mind if I continue to do things the same way I have always done them, i.e., reading the Bible only when I feel like it or when the situation looks dire. God's word is living and active and applicable to my daily life. Just through the last 10 weeks, I have been shown scripture and have been given scripture that is applicable to my and Clayton's situation. One is Isaiah 55:8-9.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."

I wish I had written down the date that God lead me to this passage. I could tell you what was going on in our lives that day. I know without a doubt that it was within the last 10 weeks and that God lead me to it in light of our situation.

Yeah, so toes stepped on today and I have a new prayer (desire) in my heart tonight to help jumpstart my day tomorrow.

Still waiting

So, Clayton got a job through a staffing agency. He's filled out the paperwork, done the drug testing, and we're waiting. We know what company he's going to, but we still have to wait. On what? Background check. It should be back Monday (we hope) so he can start working Tuesday. School for him this 5 weeks is an online class, so that's good. He's seriously considering switching to night classes and working during the day. Sounds great to me. I would have to do everything in the evenings, but we'll work through whatever we have to do until he's done with school.

I've run twice since Monday. Neither run was pretty, but I got out there. Thursday, I tried to do the C25K W7D2 and just couldn't get through the 25 minutes of running. I ended up with 2.39 miles. Not bad, but not great either. I got out there today and didn't follow the C25K plan. My plan was to run until I couldn't anymore and then walk and then run until I couldn't anymore again and so on until I had been out there for 35 minutes. That's what I did and covered 2.82 miles. Go figure.

Weight loss to date: 27.6 pounds.

Happy Birthday to Me!

It's been a good day. I got up and ran/walked 2.74 miles in about 35 minutes this morning. I was huffing and puffing there toward the end, but I did the full 25 minutes of running. I've talked to both my mom and my mother-in-law today. I've finished working. I'm planning on giving blood in a little over an hour and going out to eat with my family. It's been a great day. Oh, and there have been 80-something people who have wished me a happy birthday on Facebook. Dark chocolate as a gift...perfect hot bath snack. So, all in all, 34 is starting off well.

Running

I like running, I really do, but it seems to have taken a back seat again. I ran Monday. I did C25K W6D3, which was a 25 minute run flanked by a 5 minute warm up and cool down. It was great. I made the first 5 minutes last to one end of my street and the 25 minute run started right as I made the turn at the stop sign. Came ALL the way up the street to the other stop sign and back down the street to the original stop sign before the 5 minute cool down started for a total of 2.79 miles. I really think I enjoy street running much more than track running. I like the challenge of the hills (which I think I did quite nicely on).

I was supposed to run yesterday, but it was raining when I woke up and I just couldn't get myself moving. I planned on going this morning, but again woke up to rain (thunderstorms) and couldn't get moving. Tomorrow's forecast is more of the same, so maybe Saturday will be the day.

Praise You in this Storm

I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

[Chorus:]
And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to you
And you raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

[Chorus]

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

[Chorus x2]

If You Want Me To

The pathway is broken
And the signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to

No I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
So if all of these trials bring me closer to You
Then I will walk through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When You lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'll never go alone (yeah oh oh)

So when the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the sufferin' Your love put You through
And I will walk through the darkness
If You want me to

'Cause when I cross over Jordan, I'm gonna sing, gonna shout
Gonna look into your eyes and see you never let me down
So take me on the pathway that leads me home to you
And I will walk through the valley if you want me to

Yes, I will walk through the valley if you want me to

Came and went

So, Thursday came and went without any word. Friday also came and went. Looks like we're waiting for Monday to know whether or not this chapter is over. It's been a peaceful, calm week. I feel good about whatever the outcome is. Praying that it is a good answer.

I have good news! I can now see the carpet in my living room. It's been vacuumed. It's horrid, though. Spots and stains everywhere. I was going to try a stain remover that I found online, but realized after I sprinkled the baking soda on the carpet that I have to vacuum it up before blotting it with vinegar, dish detergent, and warm water. Guess it will wait until tomorrow since everyone but me is in bed and asleep.

I still haven't done anything more on my bathroom. I really need to get on it so I can get it finished. Today would have been the perfect day since we didn't go to the in-laws' and spend all day there. Maybe next weekend. Or maybe I'll work on it during the week.

In running news, I've started C25K again, but picked up at week 6. I did the first 2 days and managed both pretty easily. I even added distance to the 2nd day compared to when I first ran it back in February. I was supposed to do day 3 on Friday, but my calves were (and still are) sore from jumping rope Thursday afternoon. I didn't do much more than 5 minutes, but that was enough. I may try again a couple days next week since it's good cardio exercise. I plan to attempt W6D3 Monday. It's a full 25 minute run, so we'll see how that goes. I still need to find a 5K to do so I'll have more focus. I covered 2.3 miles in 30 minutes on Monday and 2.63 in 34 minutes on Wednesday.

Simply being thankful

Tomorrow is D-Day, so to speak. We are praying that this trial is over tomorrow. I have such a peace right now. I know that whatever happens tomorrow I am loved by the Almighty God. He holds my right hand. I have much to be thankful for. I have seen God's hand throughout this entire endeavor, no matter how absurd it has seemed. (And, yes, it has seemed quite absurd at times). I have been given His peace that passes understanding. That sounds so...churchy...but truly, there is no other description. I am thankful for the body of believers that has surrounded us and has lifted us up and has believed in us. I am thankful that the same body of believers will continue to lift us up tomorrow and through whatever may follow. I am thankful that I have been brought this far. That I can look back and say that yes, my faith has been tested. Yes, bad things have happened. Yes, bad things may still happen. BUT, my God is faithful. He has brought us through each trial. He has brought us closer to him. He has brought us closer to each other. Oh, that I were as faithful to him as he is to me. What a wonder that would be. Thankful for forgiveness. For the perfect, sinless man who died on a tree so that I may live. Thank you Jesus.

Quiet few days

The last few days have been quiet. I've been peaceful and not worried about the outcome of this whole situation. Clayton and I were finally able to sit and talk about all of it Friday night. Hearing his view and feelings helped me tremendously. Yeah, we have no idea how this is all going to turn out, but we're praying, believing, and expecting for it all to end by Thursday. If it doesn't, God is STILL in control and we will trust him to give us the strength to get through the rest of this ordeal. I am so thankful for the faithful friends and family who have been praying us through this. It is humbling to know how many people are praying for us and praying constantly. I know that through this, God has brought Clayton and me closer together. He has brought me closer to himself. If that is all that comes out of this, it's enough. It's worth going through this trial to be closer to my God and to my husband.

Time for more thankfulness

1. Healthy family
2. A job I love (most of the time)
3. Peace from God
4. A couple hours by myself each day
5. Worship on Wednesdays
6. Covenant group
7. A loving husband
8. Christian radio
9. Random (or maybe not so random) Bible verses
10. Prayer for others
11. Prayer from others
12. A roof over my head
13. Clothes on my body
14. Food to eat
15. Money in the bank
16. God's timing - even when I don't understand it
17. Family who cares
18. Running water
19. Two working vehicles
20. An entertaining cat...especially when the neighbor's cats come on our porch
    

Can't work

I'm supposed to be working, but I can't when God is speaking to me from every angle. Daily Bible verse for today: Romans 8:32 - "He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?" He gave Jesus for us, to take away our sins. The ULTIMATE thing he could ever give. How can he not give us all things? And to follow that, the one that brought me to tears just now, Casting Crowns posted on FB: "Do not be anxious about anything but in prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God and the peace that passes all understanding will guard your hearts in Christ Jesus." Found in Philippians 4. Thanksgiving. Even in the hard times. When you don't understand what HE is up to. When it hurts to walk through the fire. The peace is indescribable. It's incredible. Just to know that He is there. Walking with you. I've never known that more than I have in the last 6.5 weeks as my and my family's world has been turned on its side. Through it all, though, God has been good. And He will continue to be good. I firmly believe that.

Will it end?

We got a phone call yesterday that puts a hold on moving on from police work and into computer work. My first reaction was a bit panicky. Finances. New phones. Gave money away. At that moment, God reached down to me and reminded me that Clayton and I have been in his hands throughout this entire situation and that WE ARE STILL THERE. He hasn't let go of us. He isn't going to let go of us. He knows all about what is going on and how it is going to end. And WHEN it will end. I have to be honest, I am beyond ready for all of this to be over. Whatever the rest of this trial is that we have to walk through, I just want it over. I'm worn out. Clayton's worn out.

Yesterday's verse from Daily Bible was 2 Thessalonians 3:3 - "But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one." How I needed that encouragement. He IS faithful.

Catching up again

So, I ran again Friday morning. Settled into the run earlier than the previous runs, but still couldn't hold it for more than about 8 minutes. Total distance was 2.32 miles. It's not looking good to run in the upcoming week. Supposed to rain tonight through Wednesday night. I don't mind running in the rain, but it's supposed to rain pretty hard, at least tomorrow.

We did a little shopping this week. New cell phones, new clothes for Clayton for his new job, and a birthday present for my nephew who will be 5 this week.

Friday we drove down to Atlanta for his birthday. I always love spending time with my parents and my brother's family. We just have a good time. We at supper at a place called Huey Leuy's Friday night. Really good Mexican food. We had a great time and got pictures of the kids (and my dad) in the "happy birthday" sombrero. Great memories. Saturday was the birthday party at the park. Supper was smoked burgers, grilled corn on the cob, potato salad, and baked beans. So much good food this weekend.

I've got bread rising so Clayton can take his lunch/supper to work this week. Looks both of those meals will eaten out of the house.

...and in running news...

Today's run was much like Monday's. I just couldn't get settled until towards the end and walked more in the beginning and sooner than I really cared to. My legs just wouldn't go and my breathing wasn't even. At least I was able to settle with about 8 minutes left instead of 5 minutes. It's not much, but it's a start. Covered 2.47 in 30 minutes today. Maybe Friday I'll come home and run instead of being out at the track.

Isaiah 29:13

The Lord says: These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is made up only of rules taught by men."

Praying my worship today is more than rules taught by men.

Hallelujah!

Clayton got a call today that he got the job he interviewed for this morning! His title is "Network Support Engineer." I don't know exactly what that means other than the fact that he will be doing computer related work. God is SO good to provide a job in the field that he is studying in now. Just one more hurdle to get over now.

Blessings through tough times (or things I'm thankful for...in the past week)

1. Spending time with Leslie and her family
2. Remembering a godly man and celebrating his life
   
3. Family waiting at the airport for me
4. Two hours at the beach on a gorgeous day
5. Brunch with 2 close college friends
6. Picnic at the lake with my church family
7. Seeing people I haven't seen in years
8. Helping someone in a time of need
9. Upgraded car
10. Three days off of work
11. Seeing God's hand in a difficult situation
12. Seeing a family pull together to make decisions
13. Being invited to stay even though I'm not related by blood or marriage
14. Phone calls with good news
15. Visiting with both grandmothers
16. Lunch with my parents when other lunch plans fell through
17. People in SC praying for complete strangers in FL
18. Being missed
19. No seatmates on the airplane (lots of reading!)
20. Comfort through God's word
    

Running and other things

So, I've been averaging a run about twice a week since school let out in May. I was hoping that when school started back (2 weeks ago today) that I could get back into my 3 times a week. No such luck so far. The first week I only ran once. My watch was dead that Monday, so I'm not exactly sure how long or how far I ran. I don't remember all the circumstances for the following week and why I didn't run again, but I didn't. The next run was a week ago today. It was decent, 2.51 in 30 minutes. Next was Thursday, in Pensacola and 85% humidity. Oh, how it was hard to breathe in that, but I managed 2.3 in 27.50. Surprisingly, the first mile clocked in at 9.40. I've NEVER done a mile that fast. NEVER. Maybe that's why the 2.10 to make 30 seemed like an eternity and I stopped. I got back out today and did 2.33 in 30. I was sluggish today. Couldn't get into the run even though I tried. I usually can do the first mile without much of a problem, but at 0.75ish I had to walk for a little while. The last 5 minutes were great. I got settled into the run just in time to stop. At this point, I'm planning on getting out again Wednesday. The morning weather has cooled off considerably (in the 60s!) so it's been really nice.

I'm working on a project in my bathroom. It needs to be painted. I took most of the wallpaper off one day last week. All that is left is what is behind the toilet. Also, the popcorn ceiling was falling over the shower, so I made the decision that I was just going to take all of it off. I did that this afternoon. It was easy, but VERY messy. I swept up what I could, vacuumed up more, and will have to mop to get the rest up. I'm planning on painting the ceiling a bright white and the walls the sage green that was supposed to go in Kristin's room before she was born. I've found a shower curtain at Target that is brown and has the same shade of green in it as the paint. I think I might mix and match green and brown accessories and maybe change all the drawer knobs from polished brass to chrome to go with the faucets. I would love to do something brushed, but we can't change the faucets right now. We just put these in less than 2 years ago. Project when this one is finished is to either paint the kids rooms or repaint their bathroom. Both need to be done...

Legacy

As I reflect over the activities of the past week, I wonder what kind of legacy I will leave. I had the privilege of reuniting with my best friend this past week. It's been 5 years since last I saw her. We picked up right where we left off. The circumstances were bittersweet. You see, her father passed away August 20th. He was a godly, easygoing man, yet firm in his beliefs. He and his wife produced 4 children and raised them to be godly people. They also raised them to know their own minds and to stand up for what they believe. That can get pretty interesting when they're not in agreement, but it's a credit to them that they can sit around a table and talk and work things out for the best of all involved. Mr. Parker's legacy isn't limited to just him. It fans out around him through his wife, his children, his grandchildren, his friends, his coworkers. Proof is in the people who drove 2 hours to be at the visitation and funeral Thursday night. Proof is in the crowded bottom floor of the sanctuary where the memorial service was held.

Some of my best memories were made with the Parker family, like the time we went to New Orleans for a day, spending the night in Biloxi on the way there. Or the time Leslie and JJ came to see me at college and instead of staying there, we went to Biloxi and water-skied and visited Boomtown Casino. Or the surprise birthday party for my 20th birthday. I love how I am considered family even though I'm not related by blood or marriage. How when no one but family was around Thursday night and Friday afternoon, I was there and welcomed and no one thought anything of it. 20 years is a long time to call someone your best friend. I've been fortunate to be able to call Leslie my best friend for at least that long. In high school, if you saw one of us, you most likely saw the other...even though we went to different schools. Trips to the beach and stopping at BK on the way home for Whoppers. Just hanging out and watching a movie. Yes, legacy extends to the family and to the memories made with the family. Bittersweet. Bitter because of the circumstances, but sweet because of the new memories made.

I'm leaving...

...on a jet plane. I'm flying out to Pensacola in the morning so I can be with my best friend and her family at her father's funeral services. I'm planning on meeting up with some other friends while I'm in town and have a day of relaxing at the beach (at least for the morning). I think I've only ever gone "home" once before without any of my family...and that was before the kids were born...and only for a couple days. I'm looking forward to some down time. I'm going to miss Clayton and the kids, though. I know they'll be well taken care of while I'm gone...they can take care of themselves and Pop and Nona will have the kids a couple nights.

Blessings

1. My husband - he's sending me to Florida for the funeral of my best friend's father
2. Airline ticket and rental car for less than an airline ticket costs
3. Weekends in Charleston
4. Scripture
5. Making plans to see friends from college
6. My children being back in school
7. Running
8. Music
9. Peace from God
10. Love and support from my Christian family
11. Handel's Messiah - how fun to learn!
12. Sleeping in my own bed
13. My MIL - willing to take the kids to school Wednesday and pick Kristin up Wednesday and Thursday
14. Prayer
15. Praying for others
16. Others praying for me
17. My parents
18. Conversations with my grandmother
19. Conversations with my kids
20. Conversations with my husband
    

Since last time

• My husband has resigned
• My kids started school
• My best friend's father passed away
• We've been to Charleston and back
• I've secured airline tickets and a rental car
• I've run/walked 2.5 miles in 30 minutes
• I've had good conversations via FB
• I've missed my church family
• I've run/walked about 2.25 miles in 40ish minutes
• I've watched Tangled...twice
• I've had really good seafood
• I've been in the Atlantic Ocean
• I've ridden in a Cobra Mustang
• I've have peace that passes all understanding
• I've been encouraged by brothers and sisters in Christ
• I've encouraged a sister in Christ
• I've believed that Christ holds all things together
• I've missed choir rehearsarations

Quick post

School starts tomorrow, thus a new schedule starts tomorrow. I'm looking forward to getting back on a regular schedule. (The waking up early, not so much...) Alarm is set for 6 so I can get up by 6:30 (I know how I work) and can get the kids up and moving. Hoping to leave by 7, but a little after won't hurt. Since tomorrow is the first day, I plan to walk the kids in and take at least Kristin to her class. After that, I'm heading across the street to the track to get a run in. I'm hoping to run more than I walk and to last 30 minutes.

Special scripture

Over the past 3 weeks, I've read or been given scripture that is encouraging to Clayton's work situation: Psalm 118: 15-18 and Proverbs 18:17 are the 2 that stand out at the moment. Many, many people have been praying for us and we have been at peace with the entire situation and whatever the outcome may be.

Playing catch up....maybe

I'm going to attempt to play catch up with the blog tonight. Not sure if I'm going to be able to word things just how I want to or not since there's been a lot going on. The following is in no particular order of importance or even sequential...they are listed as they come to me.

• Clayton and I celebrated 12 years of marriage on July 24 by spending the weekend in Gatlinburg, TN
• Same weekend, Clayton was put on paid leave for allegedly beating up someone in his custody; he's still on paid leave and we are waiting for the situation to be resolved
  
• Kids are registered for K-4 and 3rd grade
• Clayton passed a HUGE certification test for Network Security (he's been in school for a year and has about a year to a year and a half to go)

Those are the big things that have happened over the last month. Other, inconsequential things have occurred, too. I've been running on the treadmill off and on this summer. I don't particularly care for the treadmill. It's boring. My leg hurts when I use it. I have to remember how far I ran in what distance rather than just uploading my run from the Garmin watch. I'm stuck at a set pace unless I manually change the pace. On the upside, I have gotten back to almost a full 30 minutes of running and am back up to about 2.6 miles. The kids go back to school Monday, so I plan to be at the track right after I drop them off so I can get used to running outside again and getting back on a regular schedule.

Weight loss to date: 26.5 pounds.

Day 8: Museum

Friday started a little rocky. I wanted to go visit both my grandmothers even though we had seen them Sunday. The purpose was two-fold for each of them: we had pictures to give each of them and we wanted a cookie recipe from one and the other had something for me. So, we called each and headed over. We visited with my dad's mom for a little while and even invited her to go to the museum with us. She declined because she needed to get her hair done. Right before we left, we got the cookie recipe from her. Next up was my mom's mom. She had books and a pin for me. The pin is special because it was given to her by my dad's grandmother. (Yes, odd, I know, but they lived next door to each other for years). When we left there, we went to Zaxby's for lunch and ran into Allison's sister and 2 of her kids. When we all finally finished eating, we went out to NAS to the Naval Aviation Museum. They've got a new hangar that wasn't finished last year when we were there, so we were excited to visit it and see what's there. Unfortunately, we didn't have a lot of time in there because we decided to do the simulator and the line was pretty long. Clayton and Andrew were first up and then I rode it with Andrew. That child LOVED it. Kept me upside down for a good bit of it, too. Jason and Allison also rode. Mom kept an eye on the baby and the two 4-year-olds. After the museum, Mom, Allison, Andrew, Kristin, and I went to Joe Patti's for crab and scallops to add to our low-country boil. Talk about a great meal (just needed a little more spice). Corn on the cob, sausage, potatoes, crab, shrimp, and scallops. A new tradition, I do believe. After supper, Andrew turned the TV on and the Singing Bee was on. I don't have a clue what song was on, but it had a great beat for doing the oompa-loompa dance where they bob up and down. I started doing that and announced that I needed someone to go opposite me. Mom took one look at me and started laughing and started going opposite me, but by then I was laughing so hard that I couldn't do it. I laughed so hard I cried and had to take my contacts out. Allison drove us to Publix to get the ingredients for the cookies. We made very yummy chocolate chip cookies when we got back to the house and then went to bed.

Day 7: Canoeing

I wish I had pictures from the canoeing trip. For that matter, I wish I had video. Eleven miles down the Blackwater River with my brother, his wife, my nephew, my husband, both my kids, and my dad. That was approximately 5 hours of canoeing. It started out as a beautiful day. Beautiful. Hot. Cold water. We made it to our lunch stop before anyone tipped over...and it wasn't me! Kristin got out of the middle of the canoe and it was enough to tip the canoe a little and Dad fell into the water. We continued down the river after lunch. By the time we got about 3/4 of the way done, we were hit with a downpour. I've never canoed in the rain before and it was great. We all headed to the trees and sat in the canoes under the trees until it eased up some. It was a great break from the heat.

We were told that pizza was on the menu for supper. Clayton decided that we would take my parents out that night (my brother and his wife were spending time with her family). He also decided that he wanted to go to McGuire's Irish Pub. I lived in Pensacola my entire life and had never eaten there, so he decided that's where we were going. We all had hamburgers except for Mom and Kristin. Mom had the Rueben sandwich and Kristin had fish. Each of us got a different burger and all were great. Clayton even decided that McGuire's will be an annual thing now. I'm good with that.

Day 6: Beach

Wednesday morning was spent at the beach. We got up early enough to be out there by 8 a.m. so we could watch the Blue Angels practice. It wasn't anything like their show, but it was still fun to watch. We had to stay out of the beautiful water until they were done, so about 10:15 was when we went out. We waded out and there were thousands of tiny fish swimming around. I couldn't deal with them swimming all around me and in my swimsuit, so I headed back to shore. A couple minutes later, Clayton called to me and said they were gone from where he and my brother were. Out I went. We enjoyed being in the Gulf and relaxing. Unfortunately, when we got back to the house, I found 2 dead fish still in my suit. Blech.

Day 5: Pictures & Bowling

Tuesday morning started with an appointment at 10 for the kids to have their pictures made. It was one thing after another that morning. Mom had bought special shirts for the kids to wear for their pictures. Our first mistake was not putting them on the kids before we left the house. The second mistake was leaving them at the house. Fortunately the studio wasn't busy and Jason was able to go back to the house and pick them up. Jacob had a meltdown about putting his shirt on at the studio...evidently it really was about not wanting his picture made. Jason and Allison finally worked through that with him and got him out of the dressing room. He still wasn't real happy about it, but did sit on the floor with the other kids. Finally, he did what was expected of him and we got a ton of great shots.

We went bowling that afternoon after Dad got home from work. We had a ton of fun...except for Andrew, who thought real bowling would be as easy as Wii bowling. First game was a bust for him. The second game, we decided to use the bumpers for all the kids and things were much better. Andrew even threw the ball with his right hand some, and seemed to do better that way. Bowling alley food for supper that night!

The highlight of the evening was leaving the bowling alley and having a jet flying low...and right over our heads.

Day 4: Fireworks!

July 4 and the fireworks are the main reason we vacation in Pensacola every year. I love going home and going downtown to roam the streets and find people I know and then watch the fireworks. Last year, we started something new...stopping at KFC for chicken and picnicking before the fireworks start. We walked down the road and found friends I grew up with and caught up with them. Back to our spot we staked out and waited for the show to begin. The drive home is always interesting and it was no less interesting this year as we almost got turned around. But, thanks to my husband's superior driving skills, we made it home easily. No KK donuts this year, though. Dad said the line was too long.

Day 3: Family Cookout

Sunday, we went to church for the patriotic service (I got teary). We kept all the kids with us and both girls fell asleep. They were giving out flags as we walked in. I think we brought home about 8 of them. Following church, we went back to the house and had either sandwiches or salad for lunch since we were cooking out for supper. For our cookout, we smoked hamburgers and sausage. My uncle brought potato salad and my grandmother brought a couple drinks and some baked beans. Mom made vanilla ice cream and my aunt made and brought chocolate ice cream. We had a good time sitting around and talking and catching up on what's going on in our lives. Jason and Allison left around 7 and met friends at McGuire's Irish Pub. Sunday was a pretty laid back day overall.

Day 2: Picnic

So, day 2 was a picnic with people from high school. Not many of us showed up, but it was neat to get to see people that I haven't seen in at least 16 years. It was hot and it rained, but the food was good as was the company. Before I left for the picnic, Clayton, Jason, my dad, Andrew, Kristin, and Jacob went to Home Depot to do their monthly kids' activity. They built a coaster holder and glued cork onto wood to make coasters. Both my kids enjoyed it, so I see us going back each month. Kristin came back to the house and painted hers with watercolor paints that Mom bought. Also that day, I got up around 7 and got out and ran a mile. That was all I could handle because of the humidity and temperature.

Day 1: The Drive

So, day 1 of our vacation was the trip to Pensacola. We were in the truck for about 8 hours. Fortunately, it went pretty smooth after Clayton and I got our usual argument out of the way. Happens every year. A cup of coffee and prayer made it much better. Airplanes flying over us in Atlanta helped, too. We finally made it in time to enjoy fettuccine alfredo with fresh shrimp from the Gulf for supper with my parents. My brother and his family arrived later. And, that was the first day.

Vacation is over

There are so many things to tell about vacation, but I will have to do it later. Right now, I am very much looking forward to sleeping in my own bed. I'll just leave with a couple pictures and tell the stories as I have time in the upcoming week.

Building it back up

Since I had no kids at home yesterday, I went to the YMCA early and stayed longer without going to the pool than I would have normally. I had already made the decision to do some interval running/walking on the treadmill, so I was looking forward to it. My plan was to run 8 minutes and walk 2 minutes 3 times for a total of 30 minutes. So, I got on the treadmill, found a comfortable pace and started running. I hit 8 minutes and felt great, so I decided to go for 2 more. Still felt great at the 10 minute mark, so decided to just go as long as I could running. I hit 15, 17, 20, 22, and tried to push myself to 26. At 24.5 minutes and 2.04 miles, my body said no more...you've pushed me farther than I wanted to go already. So, I stopped. I was very excited to run that long and that far since it's been a while. I decided to stay longer and do some lesser impact exercise. I cycled for 20 minutes and then headed home. I'm going again tomorrow to run again and possibly do some other machines. I'll have Kristin with me, so I may not work out as long before we get in the pool, but my goal is 30 minutes on the treadmill.

Fun day!

Today was an easy-peasy work day: 25 minutes of dictation! Should have taken me just over an hour, but with the kids needing things and me being distracted, it took longer than that. Whatever, I was finished in time to be at the church for the kids' scavenger hunt. What a hoot that was! Two teams to complete/find stuff on a list about 30 items long. One item was a secret hand shake...our team told the children's intern that our hand shake was so secret that we couldn't show him. Too funny! (Okay, so the adults told the kids to tell him that, but it was funny all the same...) Another item on the list was to say John 3:16 with no help...ours rapped it (from the VBS version, I'm told. I never made it to the rally to see what they did). The kids had a blast and I had fun helping. We headed to the YMCA after, but didn't stay as long as normal...I was getting a headache from not eating lunch and because of sinus stuff. Kristin jumped in the pool several times without a belt, though, and was able to tread water pretty well. I was impressed.

I'm looking forward to the next few days. Kids are with the grandparents tomorrow night and again Sunday night through Thursday night. Andrew is going to VBS with my MIL, so both kids are spending the night with them for the duration. (They don't have a class for Kristin). It will be nice to have a few days before vacation time.

More blessings!

1. Impromptu ice cream dates with friends during a storm!
2. Testimonies about what God is doing
3. Oldies (yes, a blessing because they're FUN songs! Well, most of them are...)
   
4. Seeing myself in a description of someone else and seeing that I need to work on myself in a couple areas
   
5. Catching up with old friends...not that we are old, just that we were friends a long time ago
6. Kid-free nights
7. Family nights complete with pizza and a movie
8. Kids' activities at church
9. Eating supper together as a family
10. Spending time with extended family...10 in one house!
11. Turning the TV off
12. Me-time
13. Godly people around me
14. Gulf seafood (looking forward to it on vacation!)
15. Sleeping children
16. Hugs and kisses from the kids
17. Late night talks with my husband
18. Just shy of 12 years of marriage...anniversary is next month
19. Being able to pick up where I left off with some friends
20. Indoor plumbing
    

That...was God

I just had a conversation with a friend from high school. She is a new Christian and just from her conversation, I can tell a difference in her. I appreciate her willingness to open up to me and tell me some of the ways Satan is attacking her and her husband. At the same time, God was nudging me..."See what she's saying there about her situation with her husband? That's YOU." And not on the good end of the situation. My eyes were opened to how a stubborn person can come across to their family. How the "I know what I need to do, but don't you DARE tell me I need to do it" attitude comes across as selfish and uncaring and when it concerns God's Word, backslidden. See, I'm stubborn. Always have been. I have been known to take pride in the fact that I'm stubborn. Maybe that's really not such a good thing. Maybe I need to back off from the mindset that I'm always right. And even when I'm wrong, I'm still right. Yeah. I know I do. And being in the Word? Yes. I know I need to dive in and live there. I hear it EVERY time I'm in church. Yes, every time. It comes at me in Sunday School and church. When I am in the Word, things aren't necessarily easier because I'm being attacked more by Satan. His attack on me is apathy. Apathy: absence or suppression of passion, emotion, or excitement. Yes, I think that hits the nail on the head. And now, the question is how does one become unapathetic? (I don't even know if that's a word or not). In the few days that I participated in the 40 days of fasting and praying, God showed me that what I do has to be intentional. I have to intentionally set aside a time to spend in his Word. I have to intentionally turn off the computer, log off Facebook, turn off the TV, whatever. I need a plan, not just open my Bible and start reading. That may work for some people, but I've never really gotten far with it. I need accountability. Someone to ask me daily: Have you spent time with God? Have you been in his Word?

Yeah, I'm putting it all out there tonight, but maybe it's time to admit that I'm not where I want to be and that I really have a hard time setting aside time to spend with God. Maybe. It's. Just. Time.

More blessings

1. Music - love it!
2. Time with family
3. Anticipation of vacation
4. Time with extended family - looking forward to it!
5. Ice cream
6. Support groups - currently weight loss group
7. Books
8. Magazines
9. Comfortable furniture
10. Chocolate milk
11. Being debt free - outside of the house
    
12. Popcorn and caramel sauce
13. Friends
14. People who "get" me
15. Love
16. Peanuts and chocolate chips
17. Time to relax
18. Vacation planning
19. Blue sky
20. Water to swim in

I'm well on my way to my 101 things I'm thankful for post that I do every year as a note on FB.

Plans made

Well, loose plans anyway. I skyped with my brother and sister-in-law last night and we talked about what we're going to do on vacation. Yes, we vacation together every year. We stay with my parents in the house we grew up in. We always have a good time. On our list this year is canoeing (possibly with the 3 older children!), bowling, NAS air museum, the beach (more than once, hopefully), fireworks, cooking out, spending lots of time with family, professional pictures of the 4 kids, sleeping in, staying up late, Baskin Robins ice cream "date" with my sister-in-law (it's a tradition now), and 8 nights in a small 3 bedroom house with one bathroom for 10 people, well 9 people. The baby doesn't need the bathroom except for a bath. I am SO looking forward to it! The only big question right now is do I try to run while on vacation or not?

I've got the itch

The itch to get out and run, that is. I'm glad to say that I haven't lost it after taking another week off to heal. I started back running last week. Took it easy the first day...15 minutes on the elliptical and then 3 minutes walking on the treadmill and 5 minutes running. The second run was 0.1 walking and then 0.9 running, with some changes in speed toward the end. I ran again yesterday with 0.1 walking and 1.0 running, again with changes in speed throughout. I'm feeling good so far and thankful for it. I've finished my workout each time by swimming with the kids. It's time to either start working on strength training with the machines at the YMCA or start back up on the Wii Fit. My running plan is to add between 0.1 and 0.25 each time I run and stabilize at 3 miles for a good while. While I've lost about 23 pounds overall, I put part of that back on and still need to lose about 20 pounds in addition to what I put back on over the course of 2 weeks. In order to do that, I'm going to have to add strength training or some other type of cross-training to my routine. I wonder if racing the kids to pick things up off the floor of the living room would count...

Count your blessings

Music is a big part of my life. I almost always have some song going through my head. This morning it was This is the Stuff by Francesca Battistelli. The line that stuck with me is "In the middle of my little mess, I forget how big I'm blessed." That song morphed into "count your blessings...name them one by one...count your blessings, see what God has done." So, counting my blessings, big and small (and in no particular order)...

1. Family
   
2. Air conditioning
3. A house
4. Coffee
5. Bananas
6. Eggs
7. Two working vehicles
8. A job I love
9. Church family
10. Toothpaste
11. Healthy children
12. Hot showers
13. Music
14. Worship
15. Cold drinking water
    
16. Hot lunches
17. The ability to run
18. Weight loss
19. Comfortable bed
20. Medicine when needed

That's just the tip of the iceberg. He has TRULY blessed me.

What if?

I'm struggling tonight. Moved to tears by the song Blessings by Laura Story. Actually, it was more like bawling. Tears streaming down my face. Me desperately trying not to make noises since my children are asleep. Listening to the words and taking them to heart. "What if the trials of this life are your mercies in disguise?" What if, indeed? What if what I see as a trial in my life is God's mercy on me because the alternative (whatever that may be) is much worse? What if my trials are to bring me closer to the God who loves me? What if what is so heart wrenching in this life is meant to glorify him? What if it's the one thing that truly allows me to see him and his mercy and his love toward me? What if? Then, it's worth it. To be filled with a peace I cannot begin to comprehend, for God to show his mercy and his love by giving me that peace, it's worth it. For me to know that he hears every cry of my heart, big or small, it's worth it. I serve a God who loves me. I serve a God who knows my every need and my every want. I just have to remember that his timing is not my timing. His timing is perfect. Mine is not. Clinging to the peace that has invaded my soul tonight.

Starting back up

I spent a little time at the YMCA today. I dropped the kids off in the Child Watch area and headed toward the fitness center. First up, elliptical. I did 15 minutes on that machine. Next, the treadmill...and my first attempt at running since the doctor told me to take a week off. I decided not to push it and start with a few minutes of walking. At the 3 minute mark, I was bored, so upped the speed to running. I managed 5 minutes of running. I think that was a good start since I'm getting back into it. I ran with no pain and haven't had any pain for the rest of the day. My goal is to get back to 30 minutes of running and stay there for a good while. I may plan to do a couple 5K runs during the fall months and a 10K or 2 in the spring. I did take a meloxicam this morning, so I don't know if that helped me not have any pain or if I'm just doing better. I'm testing a theory tonight and not taking the Tramadol. The last few nights when I've taken it and gone straight to bed, I've been freezing and unable to go to sleep quickly. I'm skipping it tonight and hoping that I'm not freezing when I go to bed. (Which will be soon). After I spent my 30 minutes in the fitness center, I got the kids and we headed to the pool. I did not hurt when swimming this time, which is good. I'm very hopeful that I'm well on my way to recovery and I can work my way back up to longer distances.

Today is the day

Or at least is supposed to be the day. I am supposed to start running again today. Unfortunately, I don't know that I am going to have time. You see, VBS started last night and that will take my entire evening. I also have to work during the day. (I'm doing that now, can't you tell?) I'm already tired, so I'm thinking attempting to run will be put off until VBS is over. So, I'm aiming for Friday or Saturday right now. I'm also still hurting a little, so I probably do need to rest a little longer.

One of my favorite times of the year

Yes, it's VBS time! I love VBS. It's exhausting, but rewarding. I am in charge of food...for the 4th year. I love coming up with a menu and then working on those foods all week. I enjoy the busyness and how hectic the kitchen can get at times. But, I was reminded earlier this week that VBS is not about the food we serve. It's not about the games the kids play. It's about reaching others for Jesus. It's about the kids who already know Him becoming closer to Him. It's about planting a seed in the young minds and hearts of the kids who attend. Yeah, the food is good. The games are fun. The real message, though, is Jesus.

So far so good

We're almost 2 weeks into summer vacation and so far everything is good. The kids have been fighting some, but for the most part it's gone well. Each day, they have to pick up and put away 5 things in their bedrooms. Generally, they've been putting away more. It may take all summer long for Kristin to get everything put up, though. We've been spending at least an hour a day at the YMCA in the pool. Once I'm able to start running again (Monday!) then we may be there a little longer so I can hit the treadmill before the pool. Counting down the days until our vacation in Pensacola with my parents and my brother and his family.

Good, relaxing day

We spent the morning with the in-laws today. It was a nice, relaxing, enjoyable morning. We had to leave not long after lunch for a birthday party. The party was for a 3-year-old and a water party. The kids had such a good time playing in the little pools and with the water guns. I enjoyed sitting under the tent with some couples from my Sunday School class just watching the kids and talking. It was just a nice time. I'm closing out my day with an episode or 2 of Hoarders and will get a glass of chocolate milk just before bed.

Finally gave in

I finally gave in and made a doctor's appointment for my hip. X-rays were done and showed that I do not have a stress fracture or arthritis in the hip. Yay! That's good news. I've been given 2 anti-inflammatory medications to take. One is stronger for nighttime and the other is a once a day that I will take in the morning. I will be taking a week-long break from running and taking the prescriptions around the clock for the next 2-3 weeks. I am able to start back running after a week, but I am to start back at the 5K level. If I still have pain, then my family doctor will refer me to the orthopedist. I am fortunate that my family doctor also runs, or jogs, as he told me. In fact, he told me that he did the White Squirrel race a couple years ago. I'm glad that he is a runner and understands the love/need to run and how much I want to get back to it. All non-impact exercises are a go. I can swim, use the elliptical, and the bicycle. So, I'm hoping that Monday I can get to the equipment room at the YMCA and do one of those things. I would love to be able to maintain my weight until I'm able to start running again. I've lost 22.7 pounds, although my weight on the Wii is evidently not my correct weight. My mother-in-law's scale and the scale at the doctor's office are the same, which means the Wii has me about 9 pounds lighter that I am, so I just need to add about 9 pounds to my total amount that I need to lose. I'm about halfway there if I add the 9 pounds.

Spiritual discipline

Why is it so hard to be spiritually disciplined? Certainly it's because man is fallen. And maybe it's because being disciplined is hard anyway. I was thinking about this the other day and came to the conclusion that if I can be disciplined to run 3 times a week, then surely I can discipline myself to keep my house clean or spend time with God in His word and in prayer. Yet, it doesn't happen that way. I prayed the other night that I would be woken up early to spend time with God before all the goings on of the day got started and I got too distracted to spend good, quality time reading my Bible and praying. God answers prayers. I'm not so good at the follow-through, though. Yesterday, He woke me at 7:10. I got up and then crawled back into bed for another hour and a half of sleep. Today, it was 6:10. I got up and once again crawled back into bed for almost 2 more hours of sleep. Why is it so hard for me to be faithful in this? He wakes me up early when I ask for it and then I don't follow through. Why is He still so faithful to me when I don't hold up my end? Why does He love me so much that He keeps answering prayers and being faithful to me. Evidently I love sleep more than I love my God. But, He is faithful and will continue to be faithful even when I fail Him.

Everything and nothing

We've been to the YMCA 3 times now and not once have I used the equipment rooms. We've been swimming each time. I'm hoping that about Thursday, when Clayton will be able to go again, that I can get on a treadmill for a little while. I'm still having some cramping type pain that's causing me to limp a little, but I want to test it out and run for a bit. Or, I may go in the morning and leave the kids in Child Watch for a bit. Just depends how much work I end up having. I enjoyed taking the kids by myself tonight...at least I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. Andrew seems to be teaching himself how to swim. He decided to ditch the belt tonight and just use the kickboard. He ditched that also and wanted to see if he could just make it to the ladder and was able to doggy paddle there. After that, he kept trying to go farther and farther. He really surprised me with how far he was able to doggy paddle from one place to another. Of course, Kristin wanted to try without the belt and wasn't able to do anything. Planning on swim lessons for both of them at some point this summer.

I'm excited that my weight loss has picked up again. I am currently down 22.7 pounds. Swimming helps. I'm sure the 10K helped, too. Also, I just seem to be making better choices without having to think too hard about it. Speaking of choices, I could use a glass of chocolate milk right about now. I'm hungry and that will help keep me from eating. So would going to sleep. I'm tired, but not really sleepy, so I will probably be up for a little longer.

Today was the first *official* day of summer break. Yesterday didn't count because it was a holiday. The kids were good and didn't argue today. Of course, I threatened them with having to clean their rooms if they did argue. They spent time outside and when it got too hot, they came in and watched Netflix. After supper we headed to the Y. All in all, it was a good day. Praying the rest of the summer is as good.

10K is done

So, I finished the White Squirrel 10K yesterday and I wasn't last! My original goal was to run the whole thing. That was before I injured my hip several weeks ago. My 2nd goal was to finish in less than an hour and a half. I am happy to say that I accomplished that goal. My official time was 1 hour 17 minutes and some seconds. I even had to go it alone. Katie was sick and decided not to go. I'm planning on training for another one for the fall. I want to work my way back up to at least 30 minutes 3 times a week. We joined the YMCA Friday night, so I will be able to use the treadmill and not be out in the heat.

My hip isn't hurting anywhere near what I was expecting. I do have some pain when I step wrong, but for the most part I'm good. I'm hoping that a couple weeks off from running will be what I need.

Dare I?

I do. Woke up this morning with NO pain or limp from my hip this morning. Hoping it stays that way through about a 30 minute run this evening. 10K is this Saturday and I haven't been able to finish my training, but I'm still planning on making the most of it!

Back to work tomorrow

Day 3 of being off work started well. I got Kristin to preschool and headed back to the middle school to hit the track to see what I could do. I decided beforehand that I would start off with running/jogging and see how far I could go. I'm happy to say that I hit a mile pretty easily. Well, easy is relative. I was huffing and puffing because I pulled a 10:21 mile. That's pretty fast for me, so I walked the next lap and the rest of the time was spent alternating between walking and running...running the straights and walking the curves. The last minute and a half to 2 minutes I pushed a little harder and ran until I hit the 30 minute mark. I felt good about it, but wished I could have run a bit farther. I don't want to push it, though, and hurt myself further. Today's run was done mostly without pain. I'm note quite sure how the rest of training will play out since tomorrow is Kristin's last day of preschool and since Clayton is in school most days of the week. I guess I'll have to try to get a couple evening runs in when he's off work. I'd like to get at least 3 more in before the 10K on the 28th and hopefully be able to increase my mileage at least by a little so I feel a little more confident about the race.

Day 2

I'm on day 2 of being off work because the doctor I type for is on vacation. There's a chance I'll be off tomorrow, too, but will find out in the morning. Today wasn't as productive as yesterday, what with all the laundry I got washed and dried. Haven't put it away yet, but today isn't over yet. I did, however, run the dishwasher and get a head start on supper for tonight. We're having marinated pork chops, scalloped potatoes, and butterbeans. And leftover biscuits if anyone wants them. I got ahead by slicing the potatoes before I picked Andrew up from school. So, supper is in the oven now and we'll be eating about 45 minutes from now.

I took some ibuprofen while in the carline waiting for Andrew and my leg is feeling much better than it did earlier today. The pain I had earlier today was more of an ache than a sharp pain. I truly hope I'm on the mend. I plan on getting out again tomorrow for a run. I would love to get at least a 30 minute run in, but I'm pretty sure it may be more of a 15 minute run, some walking, and maybe another 15 minute run. I don't want to overdo it and really hurt myself. I plan on walking part of the 10K if I have to. I'd rather not, but again, I don't want to hurt myself further.

Completely forgot!

I wore pants to church yesterday that at this time last year I COULD NOT FASTEN. Yeah, I wore them AND they were comfortable! Comfortable! And a little, eensy, tiny bit loose! Yeah, loving it!

AND, the other news I completely forgot to record is that my brother-in-law is back in Germany with his family! Woohoo!

Woohoo!

I got out and ran this morning. Okay, it was a combination of walking and running, but the big thing is that I am mostly without pain. I had a couple issues starting out, but it got easier. I got about half a mile of straight running, so I'm happy with that for now. I'm really hoping to be out again Wednesday and get a good training run in for the 10K. Funny thing is that the shoe on my left foot feels thicker when I'm running than the one on my right. It was just an odd feeling. I felt like I was limping, when maybe I really wasn't. It felt good to get back out there. today.

So, I'm still craving a run, but my hip still hurts. After emailing with a nurse from home, she suggested that I may have a pinched nerve. I was actually able to walk up the stairs to the front door without pain after doing a stretch that I found online this afternoon. Hopefully I'll be able to run come Monday or so. I need new shoes and hope to be able to get to Fleet Feet tomorrow sometime to at least find out which ones I need. We have nothing planned for tomorrow, so maybe we can make our way there.

Craving a run

My body is craving a run. It's been 5 days since I last ran. That's the longest I've gone without running since I started in January. My hip still hurts some. I got up this morning with more pain than I had yesterday, but as I've been walking today, it's eased up. I discovered that if I actually lift my leg as if I'm marching that it doesn't hurt as much and I can move a bit faster. Will most definitely take a break from work later today and do some stretching.

Other things going on (that are probably more important than my hip hurting):

• My brother-in-law will be leaving Afghanistan soon to reunite with his family in Germany!
• Praying for a friend who is having health issues.
  
• Praying for a friend who is having work-related drama.
  
• Praying about our church-wide fasting.
  
• Praying for holiness within my family.
  
• Praying for unity (like-mindedness) in my church.
  
• Praying for family members with health issues.
  
• Praying for cousins to find jobs.
  

And, now, it's past time for me to get started working. 70 minutes of dictation + being sleepy = a long time working today.

Cautiously optimistic

It's only 9:00 in the morning, but I am cautiously optimistic about my hip. It still hurts some when I put full weight on just that leg, but it's not as bad as it has been. Hopefully just a couple more days of rest and easy hip flexor stretching (non-weight bearing stretching) will do the trick. I'm looking forward to starting my running program again soon.

Not running

Looks like running will be put off another few days. I'm still hurting when I put weight on my left leg. It's causing my thigh to hurt somewhat also. I'm not happy with the sudden halt in training, but I'd much rather heal than to make it worse. I'm just hoping I will be able to run a couple times in the next 2 weeks and can run the 10K on the 28th. Anti-inflammatories don't seem to be helping the pain at all. Wish I could figure out what's going on without having to make a doctor's appointment. I may be making an appointment for next week if it doesn't feel better by then.

Mish-Mash of things

Just a post about random things that I have seen today or that are going through my mind.

First up, my hip still hurts. Praying that rest will help and I'll be able to run again by the end of the week. (Wednesday would be great, but aiming for the end of the week at the outside).

Next, I saw a big turtle in the road on my way home from taking Kristin to pre-K this morning. It made me smile when the truck in front of me pulled off the road and a man jumped out and ran back to where the turtle was and moved it out of the road.

Another thing that made me smile this morning was seeing one of the bunnies that was living under our tree. It was sitting just outside the bushes that are in front of the house. It just sat there when I came out of the house.

I also have had tears this morning. Focus on the Family comes on every day when I leave to pick Kristin up from pre-K. Today's topic of discussion was infertility. At this point, I would consider myself infertile. Yes, we have 2 children, but we want one more. It's been 3 years since I went off BC pills and we haven't been successful, so this broadcast hit home.

Also on my mind today is my childhood friend who is going through more medical tests today as well as a college friend whose mother has broken her leg in 2 places and is having surgery today.

Mother's Day

I was woken up this morning to donuts, cards and gifts. My favorite donuts are Krispy Kreme chocolate covered, custard filled. The kids each picked out a card for me...singing cards nonetheless. My gifts were a wooden jewelry box that Andrew got from my MIL. He wanted to build one, but it was decided that finding one at a yard sale would be a good idea. He ended up not giving me the one they found at a yard sale, but one that my MIL had in her home. He says it's to put ponytail holders in for Kristin and me. The other gift was something I asked for...resistance bands for exercising.

We had a good morning at church and a good afternoon with the in-laws. I got a good nap this afternoon after lunch.

Clayton and I celebrated Mother's Day Friday night. He had to work, so we celebrated early. After we dropped the kids off with his parents, we picked up his new work phone, walked around Lowe's and looked at carpet and talked about possibly building a house a few years down the road. Then, we went to Outback for supper. It was a nice non-date night date night. We were back at the house with plenty of time for him to get ready for work.

I've decided to take a couple days off from my 10K training to allow time for my hip to heal. Yesterday was incredibly painful after my run. I iced it and also soaked in a hot bath last night to help it. I limped along at church this morning and finally took some more ibuprofen this afternoon to help. So far, it's feeling a ton better. I want it to stay that way, so Wednesday will be my next running day. Not sure what is scheduled for that day, but I'm at the point where I'm doing either 30, 45, or hour runs for the rest of the training schedule along with some cross training. I'll be okay to skip one scheduled run if it means my hip heals. It was very hard to come to the decision to take a short break. Hopefully this rest will do the trick and I can be back to running Wednesday.

One full hour

I was dreading today's run and anticipating it at the same time. 5 minute warm up, 60 minute run, 5 minute cool down and 4 x 100-m/30 second intervals. The dread came from jumping from a 40 minute run on Thursday to 60 minutes today. Not being sure if I could run that long. Wondering if my hip would allow me to even run at all. It's been painful when I walk, so I wasn't counting on finishing the run today. I got out there and started my 5 minute walk and was pretty slow compared to my pace for the 10 minute walk. It got a little easier with each step. Started running, shuffling, gimping along and told myself that I would at least go 10 minutes to see if my hip felt any better. It did. Every once in awhile a step would hurt, but for the most part it was good. I hit the 30 minute mark and couldn't tell it had been hurting before. I got bored on the track about 40 minutes in, so I headed up the hill and out the gate. Went out to the major road on the sidewalk up to the next light. Ran through parts of the town of Inman. Missed the turn that I planned on taking when I drove the area go see if the sidewalk went all the way around. So, since I missed that turn, I made a random turn before I got to Main Street and hoped it would put me out somewhere close to where I was parked. It did! I have no idea how far that part of my run was, but it kept me from looking at my watch every lap and seriously wondering if I was going to finish the run. My pace was slower than normal today because of my hip. I'm glad it was slower, though, because I'm not sure I would have run the whole thing. My total distance this morning was 5.44 miles with 4.53 of it being the hour-long run and only 0.44 of a mile was walking. Interval distance total was 0.47 of a mile. Unfortunately, my hip really started hurting when I was done running and got in the truck to come home. I popped a couple ibuprofen and that helped a little, but after any length of time sitting, it hurts to walk. At the moment, I've got ice on it and am about to go soak in a hot bath with a book.

My day started off iffy. I didn't want to get up and I didn't want to do anything once I got up. Did not run this morning, opting to go to the grocery store instead. Got my work done (with lots of distractions). Changed clothes to head out to the track for a 40 minute training run. Got through it for a distance of 3.30 miles. I did feel much better after getting the run in. I wanted to quit about half way through, but then I figured I may as well make it through at least another 10 minutes. By that time, I only had 10 minutes left, so I pushed through. I'm learning the mental aspect of pushing through a few minutes at a time. I'm amazed how often it works.

Taco Tuesday!

We're having semi-homemade quesadillas for supper tonight. Yes, I buy the boxed Taco Bell brand of taco stuff. Ground turkey is our meat of choice. Throw meat and cheese on the soft tortilla shell, fold, and slide in the oven for about 7 minutes so the shell gets just a little crisp. Sounds like a great meal to me!

Got out and did my run this morning, 30 minutes. Covered 2.42 miles on a new route. I'm finding that changing up my route helps me push through the run. Tomorrow's is supposed to be on a flat course, so it looks like I'll be heading to the track. It's the flattest place around.

Wii and TV

I love that Wii Fit Plus allows you to do a couple of the "games" while watching TV. 30 minutes of step aerobics was completed tonight while watching Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives. Is it wrong that I was exercising while watching a Food Network show? Who cares. It worked for me to get 30 minutes of cardio in since running didn't happen today. (My only problem now is that I'm hungry...)

As of tonight, though, I have lost 21 pounds since January. Twenty-one pounds. I'm getting close to my pre-pregnancy weight. My Andrew pre-pregnancy weight (hello, I got pregnant with him 9 years ago!) Well, according to the Wii anyway. I think it's off by a few pounds, but at least I know how much I've lost.

Here's where faith comes in

I have a longtime friend who is having health issues. I'm honored that even though we haven't spoken to each other in quite a while she has asked me to pray for her as she has an MRI tomorrow. Praying for peace for her, whatever the outcome may be.

I also have been asked to pray for another friend's home inspection tomorrow. The sale of her house depends on it. Praying that goes well.

There are just so many things that are in need of prayer. This country, its leaders, missionaries in other countries, local churches and their pastors, friends and family who have health issues or other issues going on. The list could go on and on and on.

“This is the confidence which we have before Him, that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests which we have asked from Him.” - 1 John 5:14-15

Lazy day

I love having unexpected days off. I had an inkling of productivity this morning; it lasted as far as organizing the tupperware stuff above the sink. My morning was supposed to start off with a 30 minute run. However, waking up and feeling like I needed to go back to bed nixed that. Well, that and the fact that my right hip felt like it was going to give way every once in awhile. I figured that I didn't want to get a mile away from the house and have it give out, so resting was on the menu. The perfect place to rest ended up being my in-laws' house this afternoon. I got Kristin from school and headed over there for some lunch and some quality time with my mother-in-law. I didn't get to see them Saturday, so this was perfect. We stayed there until it was time to get Andrew from school. At this point, I had plans to get out and run around 5:00. That didn't happen. I was still pretty tired, so I dozed on the couch for a little while. I woke up feeling more awake than I have been all day. Will be doing boot camp day 2 plus finding 30 minutes of cardio to do tonight.

I started a new exercise program tonight. I'm a member on SparkPeople and have not really utilized the site. There's a food tracker and fitness tracker and recipes and a bunch of other things. I signed up to do the spring boot camp that is on the site. It's a 28 day exercise program. Five days a week are cardio and the others are strength training. So, in addition to my 3-4 days of running, I'll be doing the boot camp. I'm hoping it will help me break out of the exercise/weight loss rut I'm in. I did drop another 1.1 pounds this past week for a total of 18.8 lost. I still have another good 15 to 20 pounds to go. Tonight's video was a 10 minute kickboxing work out. It was good to use some muscles other than the ones I run with. Looking forward to the next 27 days of boot camp.

From jogger to runner

Last night I was flipping through the 2nd book Katie gave me (the one with the really long title) just to see what was in it. The title of Chaper 6 is From Jogging to Running: Training for the Intermediate Runner. I went on to read the first 4 paragraphs which address when a "jogger" becomes a "runner." It's not a distance or a speed. It's a mind-set. It's different things for different people. It's when getting out there becomes more of a craving than a means to an end, i.e., losing weight. It's running to run. I don't know exactly when I went from "jogger" to "runner," but I believe I've made the switch. Yes, I'm still running for weight loss/maintenance, but it's more than that. It's an energy release, stress reliever, a feeling of accomplishment. Each time I get out to run and I push myself just a little farther, I marvel at the fact that I am running. Running miles. Not feet or yards. Miles at a time. My body is able to do far more than I ever imagined. I am exhilarated by the fact that I can push myself a little harder and go farther and that I want to keep trying and go farther. I thank God that he made me who I am and that I can do this and that He has given me the ability and the desire to be outside and enjoy his creation...even if I am huffing and puffing while doing so. It's just an amazing thing.

Longest run yet

I could say that about each progressing run since they are getting longer. I really didn't want to leave the house to run tonight. Really didn't want to. I had a headache. I was sleepy. I didn't think I could run for 50 minutes. 50. Minutes. 10 minutes short of an hour. Plus walking. And intervals. But, I drank a cup of coffee. I ate a banana. I went to the track and met Katie. We walked for almost 11 minutes and then ran for 50. Walked for another 10. Ran 4 100-m intervals. We covered 5.69 miles tonight. 5.69. That's 0.41 away from a 10K. It got easier about 2 miles in and then got tough again towards the last few minutes. Averaged a 12:15 mile for the 4.08 we covered in the 50 minutes of running.

I'm excited to continue reading Marathoning for Mortals by John "The Penguin" Bingham and Coach Jenny Hadfield, M.A., C.P.T. I started it at Lin and LeeAnna's house the night before the Palmetto 5K. Katie owns it and has loaned it to me. She also brought me Runner's World Complete Book of Women's Running: The Best Advice to Get Started, Stay Motivated, Lose Weight, Run Injury-Free, Be Safe, and Train for Any Distance by Dagny Scott Barrios. (Wow, that's a loooooong title. I'm looking forward to reading that one too.

I love conversations while running. Yes, I still have a hard time talking, but I do it anyway. It pushes me to do 2 things at once. Some things we talk about are the mundane, every day things. Others are TMI (and I have a bad habit of doing that sometimes). Others are spiritual. For instance, I wrote about the verse in Psalms that Katie sent me Wednesday night while we were under a tornado watch. I felt like I had failed God by not trusting in Him to give me peace that night while I slept. How? Because I didn't sleep. But, He gave me peace in my waking time. While at church that night, I felt that old panicky, bad things are going to happen feeling come over me. I got home and looked up the verse and instantly, I was at peace. Even if I had to stay up to monitor the weather, I was peaceful. I never got panicky. Yes, once when the wind was blowing and it sounded like someone was trying to get in the front door, I freaked out a little, but it also freaked the cat out somewhat. We both got over it, though. I felt better tonight knowing that I wasn't the only one who stayed up until 3 a.m. or later waiting for our watch to be lifted. I'm very thankful that I have a friend I can talk to about pretty much anything that comes to mind, whether it is God-stuff, every day stuff, or even TMI stuff. (She may not be thrilled about the TMI stuff, but sometimes you just gotta talk about it...)