I know, it's been forever. I'll work on that. Really. I just had to come over here today to record a FB status I just wrote so hopefully I won't forget it because it's so true.

"I love how just a few minutes in God's word can settle my spirit.  Doesn't matter what I read, I know His word is alive and active and speaking to me."

I was having a bit of a spiritually unsettling morning. Questioning things. Wondering about my salvation (again) because I'm hesitant to participate in a particular activity and because I have such a hard time being in the word every day. It's a discipline, I know. Discipline by definition is training. I have trained myself to run 3 times a week and for pretty decent distances at times. WHY, then, is it so hard to train myself to be in the word more than once a week, every 2 weeks, month? It's something I'm struggling with right now.

I did pick up my Bible this morning and read out of 1 Peter. All I did was read. Did not meditate or dig deeper. The Holy Spirit settled my spirit with just the reading of a few verses. I don't want to forget this. I want to remember so I can return again and again to His word for the spiritual feeding I so desperately need and yes, so I can help others to do the same. It's what I, as a Christian, am called to do. Yet, I buck against it. I give excuses. I fear what people will say. I do not have boldness when it comes to sharing what Christ has done in my life.

I know Christ lives in me. The very fact that I'm struggling with spiritual matters tells me that. One part of me wants to push for the prize that awaits. Another part just wants to sit and be content with where I am and not move forward. That's the struggle. Today, pushing for the prize is winning. I spent time in God's word. It's a good place to start.